Articles Tagged with divorce

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Last month I wrote a blog post highlighting many of the practical considerations in trying to negotiate a divorce2-300x200 resolution of a divorce given the dramatic and significant impacts caused by the coronavirus pandemic. The loss of jobs. The reduction of income. The decline in the value of assets. Even more important was the uncertainty of how long this situation would continue. I wrote that blog post during the peak of the crisis. As I write this blog post, things have stabilized somewhat. The curve was flattened and the rate of new infections have declined. SLOWLY some of the restrictions have been relaxed and some businesses are reopening and activities being allowed – with strict guidelines. Optimism remains tempered with trepidation over the extent to which things will return to some level of “normal”. However, most people seem resigned to the reality that things will not be returning to the way things were anytime soon, if at all. Confronted with this uncertainty, and the considerations raised in my earlier blog post, one might conclude now is not the right time to pursue a divorce. I submit this should not be the determiner of one’s decision.

There is no question that the decision to terminate one’s marriage is a major, life-altering one. It is not one to be made rashly, on the spur of the moment, or as an emotional reaction to a given situation. When I meet with a prospective client for the first time, I always inquire as to the reasons why they are considering divorce and the extent they have considered or pursued all reasonable efforts to save their marriage. Hopefully having weighed all these considerations carefully, the decision to divorce remains a highly personal one. It is a purely subjective one. Once counseled as to the legal consequences of that decision, it is one to be respected. One point of caution, however. The pandemic itself should not be the sole reason why someone decides to end the marriage. This situation is as “novel” as the virus itself. To one degree or the other, everyone has been impacted by it – stress, fear, uncertainty – be it emotional, health-wise, or financial. Parties to an otherwise solid marriage should be able to work together to overcome these consequences, or make every effort to do so. It is the marriage that is already on shaky ground that the pandemic and its impact can be the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Once a spouse comes to the decision that the marriage is over and can no longer be saved, the question is whether now is the time to commence the divorce process. I submit that the decision to do so or not should be the same now as before the pandemic arrived.

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It goes without saying that the impact of the coronavirus pandemic has been widespread and file2381251825687-238x300devastating. It has been dramatic and sudden. It has reached every corner of the globe. It has affected virtually every institution – political, economic and social. It has touched every community, every family and every person in some way. For those already going through the personal upheaval of divorce, it’s emotional and financial consequences have only served to make a difficult situation even more stressful and complicated. Even though the vast majority of divorce cases will end up being resolved by the parties by way of a negotiated agreement, the pandemic’s impact has clearly had a drastic effect upon the parties’ ability to negotiate a resolution of their cases at this juncture.

Front and center on our website is the quote from Justice Brandeis: “Nothing is settled until it is settled right.” The pandemic has certainly put this to the test. Until six to eight weeks ago, we were in the midst of a period of sustained economic prosperity. Unemployment was at historic lows. Incomes and wages were up. Businesses were flourishing. The stock market and other investments were at record highs. The real estate market had finally rebounded from the impact of the recession years earlier. One of the biggest keys in trying to negotiate a resolution of a divorce case is having some sense of stability in regards to the family’s financial picture now and of its predictability into the future. When it comes to issues of support, a payor spouse’s willingness to commit to an amount to pay is not only tied to what he or she is earning then, but the reliability of these earnings going forward. When it comes to the division of assets, determining what allocation or distribution of same would be fair and equitable depends not only on being able to identify and value those assets at that time, but some level of predictability of what will happen with those assets into the future. Until recently, that task seemed fairly easy. However, the pandemic has swiftly turned this process on its head.

Record employment has turned to record unemployment in a matter of weeks, largely the consequence of the government’s policy to shutdown “non-essential” businesses in an effort to blunt the spread of the virus. Twenty-two million claims were made for unemployment in the past three weeks alone. Even if people didn’t lose their jobs, they may have suffered a reduction in hours or pay. Social distancing and stay home requirements have further curtailed many jobs and other economic activity. Many businesses have been closed or have seen their revenues drastically reduced. To make matters worse, no one has been able to predict with any level of certainty how long the shutdown will last – weeks, months, until there is a vaccine – or even what the impact all of this economic dislocation will have either short-term or long-term. Whenever it is over, will things simply return to the prior “normal” or will a new “normal” come into being? Will people get their old jobs back? Will there even be businesses or jobs to return to? How much will future earnings be impacted? Will the stock and financial markets rebound?

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covid19-300x200Co-parenting children when parents are separated or divorced can be challenging in normal circumstances.  One would agree, however, that times are not normal.  The country is in the midst of a pandemic due to the COVID-19 virus.  Governor Murphy has closed schools and many business, and he has directed that we engage in “social distancing” and stay at home for the indefinite future.

Families all over the State are concerned about their children’s health and well-being, not to mention family finances due to the number of people who have lost jobs, been furloughed or suffered from cuts in pay or hours.  Existing arrangements for custody and parenting time were designed for normal circumstances, not necessarily for unprecedented times such as these.

Questions may arise as to how  separated parents address custody, parenting time and child support issues.  To what extent do existing orders have to be followed? Generally, many existing agreements or orders for parenting time can and should be followed.  However, can a parent withhold or refuse parenting time?  What happens if a parent or child is exposed to the coronavirus or is at heightened risk of exposure?  What if a parent, child or family member begins to exhibit symptoms?  How should parents accommodate a household that has an elderly family member or a family member with a health condition which makes COVID-19 particularly deadly?  What if one of the parents lives out of state and the child has to travel some extended distance?  What if the households do not have the same social distancing practices?   Can both parents’ homes accommodate educating the children while school is closed?  Should parenting time be modified to reflect that both parents are home more either due to having lost their jobs or they are working from home?

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A few weeks ago The New York Times published an article about a divorce in the United Kingdom caught my attention.  The article was called  “Divorce on Demand? In the U.K., It’s Not Quite That Simple“.   Does the UK have “divorce on demand”?  What even is divorce “on demand”?   Can spouses in New Jersey get a “divorce on demand”? Continue reading ›

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Summer is over. The kids are back in school. The normal routine has returned to your life.  This is a comparatively calm time for most households. There are fewer stressors, a little more “me time”0HFF1UYS9S-300x200
and a lot less “rock ‘n roll” than during the summer.  It is a good time to take stock of where you are, what you have accomplished and for those with marital difficulty the State of the Union. Continue reading ›

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This week the media was abuzz with news of the demise of another celebrity marriage, this time with the separation of professional basketball player, Carmelo Anthony, from his wife Lala

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Weddings rings and large bills of money

Anthony. The Anthony’s have been married since 2010 and have a 10 year-old son. Their potential divorce raises questions about what would happen with their assets and who would get custody of their son in their divorce, were such a case to arise in New Jersey. Continue reading ›

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I recently attended a seminar where the topic concerned the obtaining, analysis and use of medical records. While the main focus was how medical records were dealt with in civil litigation matters such as medical malpractice and personal injury cases, it was clear that a number of the issues discussed could apply to Family Court matters as well. A spouse may allege that they are unable to work, or may be limited in what type of work they can do, as a result of some sort of medical or psychological condition or disability, thereby impacting a claim for spousal and/or child support. A spouse may allege that they suffered physical and/or emotional injury as a result of an act or course of abuse by the other spouse leading to a claim for damages in an action for domestic tort. Continue reading ›

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SlashI was recently perusing a periodical and came across a story about a celebrity musician who was claiming he was never married to his wife of 15 years because of a known snafu in her earlier divorce paperwork. The headline stated “Slash claims he was never married to wife of 15 years”. (http://www.metro.us/entertainment/slash-claims-he-was-never-married-to-wife-of-15-years/zsJpjE—wsgif5AIi7dW6/). For those of you who don’t know, Slash, who’s legal name Saul Hudson (which better calls to mind the fictional character Saul Goodman of “Breaking Bad” and “Better Call Saul”),  is the prolific lead guitarist of the recently reformed rock group Guns N’ Roses.  Continue reading ›

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A new situation comedy is about to premier on HBO simply titled “Divorce” starring Sarah Jessica Parker, who also serves as an executive producer. We all know that divorce is a serious, life-altering event. Like many situation comedies that find humor in dysfunctional marriages or family situations, it is understandable why television would want to extend those notions to the divorce arena. While litigants may not see the humor of it, many times we as lawyers, looking at it from the outside, shake our head in disbelief of the types of things that otherwise good and reasonable people will do or say to try to get back at, or get one over on, their spouse, a person they used to love but now despise. Continue reading ›

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We have all heard of the shocking cost of some celebrity divorces.  But, what about the rest of us? A THREE 100 DOLLAR ROLLSdivorce can be costly at any financial level. One of the first questions an individual pondering divorce has is, “how much does a divorce cost?” And, many of us have seen the advertisements claiming that you can be divorced for $400. Unfortunately, the real answer to how much a divorce costs remains illusive. The cost of a divorce really is on a case by case basis. Continue reading ›